Intro and RE: Opening dialogue

I am a single mother of three in the public school system in a rural area. I am  full-time working mom. One of my children has been diagnosed with a learning disability, finally, when she was in high school, after years and years of prodding and questioning the school's by me. I could not understand why, when the child was obviously struggling so, did no one feel compelled to do anything about it??? But I was considered a "stupid mom" that did not know anything and was not listened to. I am having present behavioral problems with a son, and the school's response is to met out punishment, instead of ascertaining what the problems may really be and assisting to address the issues. I am not alone. I work with local families in a Native American family services agencies and confront these issues weekly with the various families with whom I work, It is not a single school, it seems to be more systemic in nature. I have been amazed when I approach a school as "an official" service provider, on behalf of a student with whom I am working professionally, I am treated with some grain of respect, but when calling the same school as a mom, I am addressed in a condescending tone and virtually always brushed off with "we will look into it", after which virtually nothing is done.

I am responding particularly to the note by Irvin, Robert.

There seems to be an assumption that the teacher monitors student progress on an individual basis. In the schools my children and many of the children with whom I work attend the parent MUST WEEKLY request a progress report. This is not realistic for many working parents to schedule a weekly phone call to the school to request the report. Suggestions made by the teachers for student improvement include options not viable for many families of the children they teach, such as after school programs for which no transportation is available. Other teachers bemoan a student‘s failing  performance, but are not available to actually address the issue: Why is the student having such difficulty? When a student's behavior is an issue, the school's send the children to detentions, thereby assuring more missed class time (this has seemed a particularly counter productive action in my view). One school locally actually "calls" parents with an automated system, at approximately 4:30 in the afternoon, when most working parents are not at home, so there is a message on the machine, or a child may answer and hang up on the machine, or the child the call is about may erase the message. When the school was questioned about this perplexing practice the school responded that they do not have the ability to personally call parents in the evenings when the parents are home. This model of "student-teacher-parent weekly monitoring of all pertinent learning features" also assumes parents are available at the beck and call of the school, and does not allow that an increasing number of parents are employed and not available during school hours, cannot afford to take time from work if they intend on feeding their family.

The K-12 system needs to move out of the 1950's in the way families are perceived, and the roles they may play. June Cleaver is no longer available. Her husband beat her or her children or both, or abandoned her, or he simply does not earn enough to entirely support the family, so she is now out of the home 10-12 hours per day earning the food on the table and the mortgage and the shoes. She is not at home making supper and waiting for the children to come home so she can feed them and assist with their homework. Wake up, California!!